Livin’ in The Land of the… well, I’m lost.

Land O' Tha Lost

Today on my TV picture-box machine, I saw something that shocked and confused my tiny primitive ape-like mind. Apparently, Will Ferrell is making a movie called ‘Land of the Lost.’ One assumes then, that this is a comedy film? *Insert confused grunting noise here.* The confusion only deepened upon further research. My memory of the Land of the Lost franchise is as follows: I remember the series from the early 90’s when I was a kid, they played it on weekends on Nickelodeon, and it was much less of a Will Ferrell-style comedy as much as a campy, slightly scary show involving a cheesy animated T-Rex with an eye condition who was constantly trying to kill everyone, with maybe occasional lighthearted or humorous moments. Mostly though I remember the show as being a cross between dark and goofy, with enough corny green-screen effects to please any Saturday morning sci-fi fan, and a bikini-clad, stone-cold, stone-age, not-technically-an-actual-cavegirl to put Doctor Who’s Leela to shame. Not to mention that jammin’ themesong -
 

They opened the doors, and found dinosaurs! Who wouldn’t be compelled by such lyrical genius? That’s why it’s stuck with me throughout the years, you see. And yet, and yet! My research indicates that the show I knew from Saturdays on Nickelodeon was not the first version of the show either, but a remake of an original show frem the 1970’s! That might explain all the eerie similarities to Doctor Who’s campy lizard-like-alien-riddled cheese parade. This vintage LOTL, though, apparently had what is quite possibly the least-rockin’ theme song of all time. Hillbilly banjo music? No please. I’m guessing this Ferrell flick is based on the older version, since the previews I’ve seen thus far have been completely sans-cave-babe. I don’t know what kind of a show this seventies version was, but I’m guessing though that it wasn’t a Ferrell-style comedy either. Maybe it’s just another case of taking old retro shows that weren’t comedies and turning them into goofy comedy films, a la Dukes of Hazzard, Starsky & Hutch, etc., etc., etc., etc. (aka I can’t think of any more, but I feel like there are and it’s late at night and I’m too tired to think clearly right now.) What I want to know is, when is the 1990’s version going to get a film adaptation (and not some crappy Ben Stiller comedy or whatever) – and for that matter, when are all my other favorite Snick shows from my childhood going to get film adaptations? I’m still waiting for The Secret World of Alex Mack: The Movie. That Larisa Oleynik was a such a sweet cutie pie. (Ah early puberty memories) Hey, while we’re at it – Rocko’s Modern Life on the silver screen, anyone?

On that (again) highly coherent and logical note, I fear I must leave you, gentle reader. I leave you with this final thought:

“Our vacation began, mapping out a plan.
But the map never showed danger down the road!
We felt our car was shakin’ as the Earth was quakin’!
Now there’s nowhere to hide
It’s the ride of our lives!
Now we’ve crossed the line
Fallen through time,
Living in the Land Of The Lost!
What a world we’ve found,
Deep underground -
Living in the Land Of The Lost!”

…LAND OF THE LOST!